Happy Birthday to Me… I just turned 60!

It’s a big number—and one I have to say doesn’t quite resonate with me on paper. Happily, I don’t feel what I used to think 60 would look or feel like. When we were kids, “60” looked a lot more like Edith and Archie Bunker than like any of the vibrant people I know today. But still… 60 is 60. A number large enough to loom on the horizon and rattle your bones a bit if you let it.

As upbeat as I tend to be, I can also take a sharp left turn into the maudlin. One night a few months ago while brushing my teeth, I caught myself wondering: how many more tooth brushings do I have left? And just like that, I was spiraling—how many more yoga classes? How many more dog walks or pickleball games where I can truly enjoy the physicality of it all, as I do now? These thoughts had never even crossed my mind until 60 was suddenly staring me down. Because let’s be honest—60 puts us on the shorter side of the longevity equation.

I admitted this mental spiral to a friend, who’s younger than I am, and she echoed the same quiet fears about turning 60. It’s not fun to think about, but sometimes we have to let those darker thoughts out, feel them, speak them, get them validated—and then, thank G-d, get over ourselves and return to our regularly scheduled programming where we behave like age really is just a number.

Which brings me to the idea that maybe it’s time for a new hashtag: #60isthenew30. When I look around, most of us look and feel way younger than our parents or grandparents did at this age. Sure, some of that may come from cosmetic enhancements, which are more available than ever—but more than that, it’s the lifestyle. We have access to healthier food, better skincare, consistent exercise, and mindfulness practices that weren’t mainstream in generations past. We’re taking care of our outsides and fueling our insides in the best ways we know how.

But another piece of the puzzle hit me while I was on vacation celebrating this milestone birthday. And it had nothing to do with how many more times I’d stand at the sink brushing my teeth. It had to do with how many more moments I would spend criticizing, nitpicking, and loathing myself while standing at the mirror over my sink.

It was in that moment I realized I had to make a shift. Because knowing what I know about mindset and mind over matter, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to determine our attitudes and thoughts about aging can harm us just as much—if not more—than a poor diet or lack of sunscreen ever could.

And ironically, it was sunscreen that inspired this whole post. There I was in the bathroom slathering it on, and once again, I’d slipped into my usual ritual of self-degradation. Picking apart the loose skin on my stomach, the crepey skin on my thighs, the sagging here, the wrinkles there. When suddenly, as clear as a bell, I heard my mother’s voice in my head say: “Stop talking about my Lauri Annie like that!”

It stopped me in my tracks. I had a choice in that moment: to keep going with the negativity, or to consciously change the internal script. Exchange every critical thought for something kind. And yeah, I know—big fucking duh. But until you actually do it, actually pay attention to your own thoughts, it doesn’t hit the same. I also know from my training we are not our thoughts, however, as humans we are prone to having them and therefore, thoughts matter.

So I did some quick Googling (after wiping off the sunscreen) and found that we have up to 70,000 thoughts a day. And 80% or more of them are negative. I thought: Shit. If we’re spending that much time running low-vibe commentary in our minds, what does that do to our health as we age? Probably nothing good.

That was the moment I decided to stop. To start reframing. That loose skin on my stomach? It’s from birthing four healthy children and carrying twins I lost at 18 weeks. I’ve never had surgery to “correct” it. But every day, I spend minutes—sometimes hours—hating that skin. It’s absurd. And it’s vain. But it’s been part of my operating system. It's why I chose this photo - unedited and real.

That crepey skin I see in downdog or inversions? Sure, it’s from aging, sun exposure, maybe even genetics. But I’m seeing it in a downdog. I’m doing inversions. Things many people can’t or won’t do. And I take that for granted. I steal my own thunder.

In addition, we know comparison is the thief of joy, right? Well, vacations are often ripe with comparison traps. I found myself wondering about the woman by the pool—does she do CrossFit? How many squats? How does her stomach look like that after kids? I couldn’t stop the thoughts. Until I remembered my mother's words and I stopped. I made a conscious decision to abort every self-loathing comparison, mind my own business and just lay there. Enjoy my vacation and appreciate I was even on one. I appreciate that I had the luxury of turning on Spotify and listening to whatever I chose. I had a view of the ocean, the smell of the sea and my husband reading a book next to me. Bliss.

But then, came a gift of validation of sorts. One of the young moms next to me (one of the ones I'd wondered about how many squats she may do daily) struck up a conversation. After chatting about kids and life, she said, “I hope I look as good as you do when I’m your age.” That’s the moment I knew: we are our own worst enemies. It was validation to indeed get onto the positivity reset train and keep going. How we see ourselves is certainly not how others see us. Not that we must dwell in that space, either. But the idea is: what others think about us is none of our business. What our business is what we think about ourselves and say to ourselves.

We have no trouble lifting up our friends, giving the pep talk, and offering grace. But when it comes to ourselves? We’re brutal. And I’m not telling you anything you haven’t heard or don't already know. But I am telling you this because it’s real, and it’s mine. And I share these parts of myself for connection. You’d think, as a wellness coach, a teacher, someone who helps others reframe their stories, I’d have mastered this by now. And I haven't but I'm making it a goal to work on it more consciously and consistently than ever before.

So here’s my birthday commitment: I’m changing my inner dialogue. Not so that I walk around full of myself, but so that I walk around with more love for myself. With more forgiveness, acceptance, and kindness. As I would so easily offer to a client or student, my friends, children, my spouse. To some of you, this news may seem surprising to hear that I need a true paradigm shift. But if you're like me at all, raised to fear aging, to fight it, to joke it away, it's a significant shift to make because even those jokes feed the lower vibe energy I no longer want to carry.

And the fear of getting older? Reminder: FEAR = Face Everything and Run or Face Everything and Rise. It's my time to rise. Rise above all the self-loathing bullshit and the time wasted within it.

So as much as I am able, I’m replacing my daily criticisms with conscious appreciation. And here’s why: those 70,000 daily thoughts? They’re like drops of water. Over time, the drip drip drip of negativity alters the stone of who we are. Creating grooves, fissures, and weak spots—right when we need inner strength the most. The strength to face the future with joy versus worry.

We’re living in the age of wellness. And the adage hits me clearly: Teacher, heal thyself.

Healing starts with looking in the mirror. And not looking away. Even when the reflection feels like the lights just came on at 2am in a bar—harsh, unflattering, too real. You look anyway. And then you choose to see with eyes of gratitude and love. And keep choosing to see that every line is from laughter and life. Every wrinkle is a privilege. And if you choose to change something cosmetically, it’s because you love yourself and want your exterior to match how you feel on the inside.

Aging can be triggering. Especially if you were raised to value youth, mock fragility, or fear the decline that comes with old age. In that case, aging stirs the waters of insecurity and no surgery or serum will fix that.

So my goal? Boost the positive. Because lord knows, there’s enough negativity already. The fact that I was adding to it with my own thoughts? That’s something I want to change.

Because our energetics ripple out. For every critical thought about that eye bag or belly fold, we’re broadcasting and reinforcing that low frequency. I’m not saying we all need to turn into a Pollyanna. But maybe… a Positive Peter? It's our responsibility to enhance the collective in any way we are able. Our energy flows where our thoughts go. The more we allow our thoughts to flow in a positive light, the more we increase that light.

So for my birthday, my gift to myself is this: a shift in mindset. And perhaps my gift may become one for you, too. Because I am you, you are me. Maybe not exactly. But I imagine we share a few of the same thoughts in terms of what we think and say to and about ourselves. So, let's make the shift together to a new frequency. Let’s remember that we woke up today—and start there, in gratitude and then dial up the knobs of self-love and appreciation.

Aging is universal—if we’re lucky enough to keep doing it. And while our experiences may be unique, our need to feel seen, validated, and respected isn’t. I know I’ve made myself sound pretty vain in all this, but beneath the vanity is something deeper. I want us to remember that our thoughts impact our tissues. How we feel about ourselves can be just as important as what we feed our bodies.

Some of you may be reading this and wonder why the heck you'd want to become a client of mine when I still have work to do on myself. I'll tell you why: I don't profess to have all my shit together, however how I recognize it, deal with it and work through it come from years of training and lived experience. What makes me a good teacher and energetic wellness practitioner is my authenticity. I teach from what I know and explain it in ways my clients and students understand within themselves. The people who want to work with me are ready to work on themselves in as real, raw, broken, and awesome ways as they show up. We do this together, and that's the beauty of my work. I will hold your hand, I will also kick you in the butt when needed. And together we create the pathway that allows you to become the truest version of yourself.

My mom lived to 92 and was one of the most positive people I’ve ever known. She never ignored pain, but she didn’t dwell in it either. So maybe today, in her spirit, we can choose to turn our thoughts toward the light—just a few degrees more. It may take practice but it's a worthy and essential exercise as we age.

Because every good thought is fuel for the longevity engine. So we can keep brushing our teeth, doing our yoga, laughing hard, and dancing on this big, wild, beautiful ride of life for as long as we get to. And remember once, always and forever: #YOUMATTER

Namaste, and thank you for reading,

xo,

Lauri

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